by Pastor Anna Gresham

Marriage is hard. Marriage is beautiful.

Genesis 2:24 (Good News Translation)
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united with his wife, and they become one.

My husband and I had a little tiff this morning…you could call it a spat or a plain ol’ argument. I have been under the weather the past few days, tired, and in recovery mode. He has a lot on his mind and, honestly, he’s trying to be everything for everyone. Essentially, we’ve been living life. One small sentence can lead to an argument and a ruined day when you are tired or fighting other battles in life. If left unchecked, it leads to what I call the “snowball effect.” A snowball by itself isn’t so bad. Multiply those snowballs, and it can deliver a blow that feels like an avalanche. Small offenses, arguments, insecurities, lack of intimacy, unkind words, missed opportunities, neglect…the list goes on. These are battles that we face daily in our marriages, and not just in marriages that are on the brink of disaster. We need to wake up and realize that the enemy is fighting against our marriages. It’s time to stop giving him ammunition.

>>> Don’t join the fight against your marriage.

My husband left to take the kids to school. My parting words were not kind. His opening words were not kind. We both were wrong. Here is where we have a choice: we can store up those snowballs to use later, OR we can ask the Holy Spirit to thaw our hearts, help us forgive quickly, and to move forward in love and grace. A snowball to the face is the worst. An avalanche of snowballs is not even an option.

>>> The love of Jesus is always the way to victory and freedom.

I’ll admit, I had about 5 minutes of the silent treatment planned for my husband. But anyone that knows me knows I can’t be quiet for more than 5 minutes at a time, so it wouldn’t have lasted anyway. Instead, I asked the Lord to help me share my feelings in the right way. God’s way. I apologized. I asked God to forgive me, and I asked for His help to not act like a crazy person with my husband. We both quickly responded with love and forgiveness.

>>> I am accountable to the Lord in how I love my husband. That’s huge. Just take a moment and think on that.

Now, I move forward. I gave it to the Lord, so it doesn’t belong to me any longer. I choose to let it go, to stop thinking about it. I renew my mind to God’s Word.

In moving forward, God wants to give us wisdom so we’re not a repeat offender. This is why we need to pray for wisdom in our marriages. This is why we listen to the Holy Spirit and spend time learning God’s voice. We must choose to grow in Christ. There are times when I begin a conversation with my husband and then realize I should’ve just prayed about it instead, because that conversation is going to end in an argument. I’ll say out loud, “Reset! We are going to reset right now and move forward. I should not have brought that up in the first place, and it’s not worth going any further.” I call this the reset button. It works. Try it.

>>> It’s in full surrender that we see the greatest victory.

When my husband and I got married, we became one. This is a covenant under God. What hurts me hurts him, and what hurts him should hurt me. He likes to say that we are on the same team, and that means we need to be each other’s biggest fan! When a problem arises, we have the opportunity for God to be glorified through our response to one another and for the enemy to be silenced.

God didn’t create marriage for us all to fail. He loves your marriage, and He loves you. God restores. God repurposes. God makes all things new. Making Jesus Lord over your marriage is choosing love and forgiveness in the good, the bad, and the ugly. Take a spiritual stand today. Submit yourself to God’s plan. Resist the urge to quit, complain, and become numb today, in Jesus’ name. Ask God for help. Pray about everything!!! Surrender your will to His will. Take authority over your marriage in Jesus’ name, and use it. Take the cotton wads of complaining out of your ears and listen to what the Holy Spirit is speaking to you today. The Holy Spirit is cheering your marriage on, convicting you of sin, guiding you in truth, and giving you power to live for Jesus. Choosing to hear and obey today will lead to beautiful fruit in your already blessed marriage.

Put the snowballs down, and go heat one another up. Yup, I said it. Get to it. Make it happen. Fight for your marriage today.

What are 3 takeaways from this devotion that you can apply today?